About That Handlebar Mustache
“The clerk helping me was a chubby fellow with a handlebar mustache. I
have no patience for contemporary handlebar mustaches. They anger me.
They look indulgent and ridiculous. If you have a handlebar mustache,
that is pretty much all you are. You are a delivery system for a
handlebar mustache. I saw a guy in Brooklyn once with a handlebar
mustache, pierced ears, a fedora hat and jodhpurs. He was a collage of
sartorial attempts at evading himself. It looked as if he were
interrupted during a shave in the mid-1850s and had to grab some
clothes and dress quickly while being chased through a time tunnel.”
